Breaking news: A Colorado cat, named Willow, has been missing for 5 years and was recently found on an NYC street. A Microchip device was used to confirm Willow's identity and now - for the very fist time - A and MK have brought Willow into cubicle central for a live interview. Oh the joy! America, meet Willow:
A and MK: Willow, so nice to meet you! We're so jealous of your adventurous lifestyle. First question, WDWD? What did Willow do....while being lost for 5 years?
Willow: Well when I fist took off (meow) I was searching for a mouse, or a chipmunk, or really just the meaning of life. As I made my way through Nebraska, Kansas, Arkansas, Missouri, Iowa, Wisconsin, Illinois, and finally to Kentucky, I realized that I was on the right path. In Kentucky, I finally got lucky (MOL - meow out loud) and met the man-cat of my dreams, Sir Billy McPellington the third, on a bourbon tour with some grrrrfriends. Sir B and I went vacationed through West Virginia, I made a bad joke about a John Denver song, and somehow we ended up at the Jersey Shore. Sir B unfortunately suffered a tragic death, of which I can't disclose details, and I spent the rest of my time in New York trying to become the official spokescat for www.kittenwar.com - a website that judges cats on cuteness.
A and MK: Wow, you're one cool cat! How did you manage to find a litter box everywhere you went? Or did you just let it fly?
Willow: Litter boxes are everywhere, you just have to look. Sometimes, you can even find a litter box in your heart. You see...right there [points to MK's heart]....there's a litter box in there.
A and MK: So you're telling me my heart is full of piss? Oh Willow, you're such a poet! Last question - in your 5 years of being lost - what was your inspiration to record the smash hit single "Whip My Hair"?
Willow: During my 5 year stint as a runaway, I realized that there were a lot of caters (cat haters, meow) out there that were trying to bring me and Sir B down. I learned that all I had to do was whip my hair/fur and all the problems would disappear. While whipping my hair/fur did cause a bundle of headaches, my stamina was higher than ever. How do you think I got this cat-sassy attitude? I'm a fine feline at the drop of a dime. I don't have time. So quit hatin and I'll be fine. Divine. Workin' overtime. Meow.
For more information on Willow - the cat or the singer - please see the following:
http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/colo-cat-missing-years-found-nyc-street-14523567
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymKLymvwD2U&ob=av2e
What an uplifting story for this blustry detroit afternoon. It truly is a miracle that Willow and Sir B found eachother. Despite the odds...true love conquered all. Tail as old as time...song as old as rhyme. Truly inspirational. It makes me want to find my own Sir B, i know he's out there somewhere waiting with cup of milk and some cat nip.
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